If I Had A Million Dollars…

I would write full-time.  And not even care if I sold anything.  Because I could probably invest that wisely enough and live cheaply enough to live on it indefinitely.

I’d probably still publish my books.

Although maybe not.

It’s nice to receive a kind review or a fan email, but I don’t really write for those reasons.  I write to see what I’m thinking and where that story will go if I actually take the time to develop it.

Now, why am I thinking about this right now?  Because I’m sitting here waiting for a work email that’s going to instruct me to change a document I was instructed to change two days ago back to the original version of the document I had.

Kills me.

Because I have this passionate hatred for wasted effort.  I don’t care what I’m getting paid, if I have to redo something for no real reason or do something that is never used it makes me want to scream.  And it makes me not so nice to the person who asks me to do it.  Especially when it’s not the first time.

Writing on the other hand? Sitting in a room alone making things up?  Ah, that’s my jam.  I’m not always deliriously happy when I’m writing, but I enjoy it.

All of it.

The writing, the editing, the moments of “what the hell just came out of that deep place in the back of my brain?”  It’s all fun.  Because it’s all me in my own little world doing my own little things without anyone else butting in.

Hmm.  Probably a good thing I’m self-published isn’t it?  Because I can just imagine my reaction to an editorial letter that told me to change something and then that same person coming back and saying they actually think it was better the first time around…And I don’t even want to see how I’d react if someone told me to make some change I adamantly disagreed with.

It would not be pretty.

Ah…to be independently wealthy.

(Of course, I’d probably become a shut-in who never left the house except to take my dog to the park and to see family and friends.  So, on second thought, I guess it’s good that my financial circumstances force me to interact with the world?  Maybe?  Although reading Yahoo news today makes me sort of hate humanity.  Cutting women up?  Raping dogs?  WTF, world.)


I so wish I could be writing right now instead of waiting for this email…


About M. H. Lee

M.H. Lee is a speculative fiction writer currently residing in Colorado whose stories are sometimes dark, sometimes funny, sometimes darkly funny, but hopefully always thought-provoking and entertaining.
This entry was posted in General Musings, Life and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

1 Response to If I Had A Million Dollars…

  1. kataar says:

    Trust me when I say, whatever you do, don’t work for the government, either as a civilian employee or as a contractor. Wasted effort is their speciality…… 😦

Comments are closed.