By this I mean that I think I’m about to have to spend a large part of the rest of the day on mind-numbing conference calls that make me contemplate such things as:

(1) That Anna Nicole Smith was a smart cookie marrying for money.  (Too bad that’s really not an option for me unless I find a near-sighted, mentally incompetent person with no taste whatsoever.)

(2) Living in my Grandma’s spare room wouldn’t be that bad would it?  Sure, I’d gain about fifty pounds from all the food she’d insist I eat and I’d spend my nights discussing Murder She Wrote re-runs, but really, in comparison, it’s not that bad

(3) Isn’t it about time we had a global pandemic that wiped out our high-tech infrastructure so I never again have to be on a conference call for three hours with some guy who forgot to mute his phone and breathes heavily?

(4) Anytime someone wants to come through a portal that randomly appears in the middle of my living room and ask me to run away with them to a parallel world to save my long-lost kin, I’m game.  I wonder what I need to do so they can find me?  Should I post a sign on the roof?  “Aliens in search of a savior check here”?

Anyway.  Given my current state of mind, I thought it was time for another round of Hayibo Humor.  So, without further ado:

Tourists flock to spot endangered smokers on night game drives

Snooze button addiction destroying lives and businesses

Struggle icons beg not to have ugly taxi-infested streets named after them

Happy Friday everyone!